Jigabooty
you made me this way
as i look down
at my soft, frail arms
i see the scars that you created
you made me hate myself
when you threw your
monstrous fists
i'd cut my fragile wrists
i liked the bleeding
watching the sweet, red nectar
flowing from my
pale, impure flesh,
slowly cleansing my soul,
was absolute bliss
i liked the pain
the absence of your
bloody fists
kills me
i believed in you
you fucked me
then left me to die
with your rotten seed inside
you left me with your fears
your words were my sanctuary
i crawled into you
i hung onto your every breath
i let you consume me
you slowly took over
my entire existence
i was your puppet
you made me this way
i see myself from afar
like i'm an angel
sent to observe my demise
i see myself falling
into a deep, dark
abyss of despair
falling
floating like a rock
deeper and deeper
until i can no longer breathe
the wind is blowing
but my innocence
has vanished
you did this to me
i keep my feelings
bottled up inside
stored away for
no one else to see
words unravel
in my confused mind
but i can't pronounce them
the valley of darkness
surrounds me
completely
everyone
underestimates my abilities
especially me
i am my own worst enemy
i did this to me
Divinity
i live in my own little world of fantasy
the tulips are my playthings
i make my own happy endings
i trained myself to believe
"love is all you need"
i hide my secrets
for no one else to see
i hide behind my purity
i make my own history
you were never really looking at me
you swallowed my divinity
you fucked me
i live in a fake reality
the real world is much too cruel for me
i'm just a little baby
i've put myself in a tiny cell
i'm too naughty
to be set free
i'm just a frightened little girl
trapped inside this body
you were never really looking at me
you swallowed my divinity
you fucked me
i just want to run free
get out of this hell
they call beauty
i'm just an ugly girl
let me set her free
for all the world to see
the real me
i don't want to be pretty
please let go of me
i feel so ugly
you were never really looking at me
you swallowed my divinity
you fucked me
i live in my own world of fantasy
i made up my own history
i live in a fake reality
please set me free
you swallowed my divinity
you fucked me
the left me
why?!?!?!?!
i can't believe my little tulip boy
doubted me
do you realize how you make me feel?
life was so much easier
when i knew you were for real
the blood now runs cold
through these veins
things have changed
and i will never be the same
i will never give you the satisfaction
of seeing my tears again
i'm gone
i'm not your whore
you can't take me back
into your hell
your mind is so fucked up
you're taking yourself down
and you're taking me with you
i just want to be near you
i just want to feel you
inside of me
i hate life
i hate you
i hate everything
i just want to go to sleep
why won't you let me sleep
you left me with your fear
buried deep within me
why do i deserve this?????
i think i'll just start over
kill myself and be reborn
somewhere along the line
now it is time for my punishment
i regret things that i have done
in my life
loving you
all that is left of me now is this
empty shell
of the little girl that once existed
you will be the end of me
i will fade into the sun
melt into mother earth
beautiful, pure creature
i so desperately want (need) to be
i can't believe this is my life.
everything
copywritten 1999 Melissa Ann Cook
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