i feed off of anger and misery
they are my only friends
jealousy is my sister
hate is my brother
truth is my enemy
i don't know what my life
would be like
if i were happy
IN THE DARK
there is so much more
behind these eyes
than you could ever
be aware of
so much pain
sorrow
loneliness
envy
all the sins
and so much more
all of this is in me
if you only knew
if you only asked
if i could only speak
i am so weak
i need to wean myself
from you
my whole life
has been consumed
by your life
now i am unhappy
and lonely
and i don't like you much
and i really truly loved you
once
which isn't fair to you
or me
but i can't let go
of the past
EXISTENTIALISM (forlorness)
blah blah blah
says the little korean man
my life drifts away
as i sit here
i realized today
that i am too self absorbed
to be nice
just like bugs
will god make me feel better?
i doubt it
not your god
not unless he can be my father
or a best friend
or a lover
why am i so bitter?
angry?
jealous?
why am i so anti-me?
blah blah blah
says the little korean man
SHE WALKS STRONG (to cashelle)
so she walks
the beautiful little girl
with so much love in her heart
she walks so strong
and i love her
more than either one of us
could ever imagine
her eyes are so open
to the world
yet her soul is so fragile
and still
she walks strong
not letting the ones she love
know how much they hurt her
she is so young
and so full of pain
and still so sweet and kind
i want to be just like her
ROCKSTAR GIRLFRIEND
i can't decide
who i am more pissed at
myself
or you
you for not caring
me for not sharing
you for not showing
me for not knowing
my whole life is you
without you i'm nothing
your whole life is you
without me you're everything
where does that leave me?
backstage
as always
i am blinded by the spotlight
that always shines on you
you never see me
i am a rockstar girlfriend
the lowest life form
everything
copywritten 2000 by melissa ann cook